There’s no cake. You’ve been had.
Remember when we were getting married?
That’s not happening anymore.
I’m not going to bore you with interesting, salacious details.
I’m not going to name names or point fingers.
(It was ChefBoy.)
However, I’m going to apologize for our inconsistency and general lack of high quality content.
I’m also going to admit that I occasionally struggle with depression.
During these darker periods I tend to give up on unimportant things like work, and people,
in favour of truly important things like crippling exhaustion, and mayonnaise.
Luckily, debilitating brain fog has helped me forget the worst of it and I can’t really explain what’s happened during these past few months.
I definitely can’t explain what it feels like to continue living with your ex-fiance.
And I sure-as-fuck can’t explain why recalling a friend’s story of a dead squirrel bleeding out onto a box of Pop Tarts made me laugh uncontrollably hard.
But I can explain that I finally felt something instead of the nothing I felt for too long.
So the next time you’re in a hazy pit of despair, staring into the void…
just remember you might hear a story about slain wildlife to inexplicably clear the fog a little.